ff7799

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ok, so your married but where do you draw the line, I mean as a couple you share alot however their has to be things that at some point you don't want to share with your partner, I'am just curious of some of the things you share with your partner and other things that you choose not to. I really ask because I've never had a solid girlfriend and I have no idea how I would ever put up with a woman when she's on that time of the month (sorry not being sexist or anything also mods don't ban me), I'am just curious how men and woman make it work, I mean theirs so much icky stuff that we all keep to ourselves so how do married people get around it.

kulotsalot

Icky stuff as in what? Shitting, farting, having her period and stuff? These are normal bodily functions so nothing you can do about that. You don't have to know the details, and she shouldn't tell you if she knows you're uncomfy with that.

I don't really understand what you mean by things that shouldn't be shared... Thoughts? Fantasies? Money? Closet space? What?

rgsmonty

wait until you are married and are about ready to have a kid and the doctor says, "hey why don't you come around here and check this out. Your son/daughter's head is just starting to come out." After something like that there is nothing that you "keep" from each other. Also, if you are married and you are sick, as in vomitting or whatever, you can't just tell your girl to not come over. You just get used to the stuff after a while. We have been married for 11 years and I can't remember the last time I got to take a crap by myself. Someone is always bothering you; wife, kids, dog, cat, you name it.

As for some of the things that kulots brought up...I have some friends who have been married as long as I have and they still have separate bank accounts and each one pays certain bills. To me that sounds like a lot of extra work. As for fantasies, shere them if you can. It will usually make sex better. There are still certain things that I don't tell my wife about, because she doesn't want to know them; i.e., that I masterbate, that I go to strip clubs with my buddies, and that I gamble as much as I do, also how much alcohol I drink when she's not around, how many cigars I smoke. Those kinds of things she doesn't want to know because she would be pissed off. It's just something that you learn over time.

Hope that helps.

davemo2us

Actually my wife was happier when I started opening up to her and sharing, lets you know your letting them in.

JackMehoff

Your just better of being with yourself

ff7799

Yah know I honestly think that sometimes, and thats not a smart ass reply, I honestly wonder if I can deal with all that crap that comes with marriage, and yes I'am easy to gross out, girls on the whole period thing isn't cool infact I find it nasty right from the ovulation to the bloody discharge, I'am disgusted with the entire notion, I'am frightened at the thought of having to watch her give birth and while sometimes I feel like I want a companion, other times I feel like I would be happier on my own, making money and keeping it all for myself, I am indeed selfish, but its rather fear, I'am just afraid. I don't know how peope do it (getting marrried and living together). Also the notion of a woman farting around me doesn't fly well, I know I'am not the only one that likes to believe that girls don't fart or crap, they don't get gas and don't have other bodily needs besides from the occassional (I need to pee). Call me a immature but I know I'am not alone and I think I should atleast get some credit for being man enough to admit my insecurities.

PirateOZanzabar

omg. when i read this i laughed so hard! my dad doesn't even close the door ne more bc he knows some one will try to talk to him.



well i do give you cred for fessing up to all of this. but honestly i don't see whats wrong with a girl farting/pooping/peeing/on the rag. i do all that (except the rag thingy) and i think its funny as hell. i just have to get a girl that laughs with me about those things.

what i am failing to try to say is that the person that you marry (if you do) will be your total match. she will know you well enough to know that you don't want to hear about her period problems, or the fact that she has to take a shit.

ff7799

I mean your right about some of that stuff, its just its embarrassing enough when I do those things, I don't need ot be embarrassed for both of us. Then again I really just need to grow up before I'am a lonely sack of lard.

MotaRaider

If you truly love a woman, no matter what nasty things can happen will throw you off. True, the first time you see something nasty it might be surprising, but thats the nature of the beast. Just suck it up....that is unless you dont really want to be with that person.

OutlawTorn

I can tell my girl anything, I mean anything. She never gets mad at me for talking to her. Fantasy, secrects, thoughts , anything. My life is open to her because I couldn't be true to her if it wasn't. She is the First Women too know this much about me and I love it cause stuff that turns off most women, she loves, and if she doesn't love it, she supports it.

But like I said she doesnt care what I tell her as long as I tell her. This applies for both of us.

tsmo

wait.. did you just say YOU get embarressed when YOU fart? yahr. 1st thing 1st. grow up alot before you start thinking of marriage.
RGS has had the best reponse so far.
You just learn to live with certian things. If you cant handle a womans period.. you cant handle women.. period.. seriously. .
Im not really sure whats to be grossed out about though? you arent actually expecting your woman to show you her rag are you? Most women are pretty smart about these things and about the only thing youll ever know is.. sorry. not this week. from then on just mark your calander.

my wife.. has never farted in front of me. ever. We taken long drives. Ive smelled odd smells.. but never heard her fart. Ive asked her. jokingly maybe your a bitch because your holding in all that gas hun. just let it go. but nope. she jeers at me and goes about her business.

good luck to you and all your bodily funtions.

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I'm a terminal non-achiever

skept

For me bodily functions are nothing to be... well afraid of. If you are disgusted by someone taking a crap / farting / vomiting - its all natural and how in the world would you handle your child who is inevitably going to do one of the above on you during the first few years of its life.

rgs hit this issue right on the head. There will be some things which will piss your partner /wife/ gf right off when you do them - dont talk about it to her when you do it. However there are other issues which are totally natural to open up and talk about.

For me for a married couple to have seperate bank accounts and do things individually is just absurd. Stuff such as finances / chores etc. they should all be shared - but of course you always need some time out for yourself so that you can reconnect with yourself.

ff7799

You do realize that just a few months back a famous Football player ended up in a real problem, his name was michael strahan and he had a joint bank account with his wife, when their marriage began to crumble she quickly went to the account and removed more than 1 million dollars. You simply can't trust anyone my friend. In the 21st century marriage isn't forever, its on a type of temporary basis where you simple agree to live with a person and sleep with them exclusively for a certain period of time and then part ways when you both can agree that you've pretty lost your purpose for each other, example is all the Hollywood marriages. They are simply hilarious, people getting married 3-5 times on average.

tsmo

....and thats the sad state of what this has become today, that you cant trust anyone.

If you cant trust your wife. you shouldnt be married to her. Thats what marriage is all about. Trust. thats the WHOLE friggin foundation. I understand where your coming from, but analizing statistics on marriage wont help you out in the long run..

They make pre nups for people like Strahan. If he was smart he would have had one. however most of us "lil" folks have basically what amounts to nothing.. if my wife leaves, and wants all my nothing. she can have it.

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I'm a terminal non-achiever