Juana!

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is this right? a proper way to teach a kid? I mean... spanking ... not something that could harm the kind too much...

i remember,... when i was a kid i stole some candy from a store... my dad gave me a nice spanking that i never stole again.... (as a kid)

what are your toughts? can we raise a better society discplinig the children this way?

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kulotsalot

the key to the method is PUNISHMENT + EXPLANATION. you have to punish a kid to reinforce the point that what he did was wrong, then you have to explain afterwards that you are not punishing him just because you want to be mean or just because you want to hurt him, it is because he should grow up knowing what's right and what's wrong. if you just punish them, kids will probably not get the connection between the act of stealing and the punishment and they will grow up feeling abused. if you just tell them "this is wrong don't do this again" but you don't give them a physical reminder they will probably feel that they got away with it too easily and will try it again. kids love to test adults, they constantly push their limits and try to see how for they can go without pushing their parents over the edge.

i've been raised with this method and i can say that it worked well. even as a 3-year-old kid i knew why i was being punished, and i was also confident of the fact that i would never be punished unless i did something wrong. my parents would always do the "explaining" part in a very calm, very reasonable voice that would invite me to talk to them and tell them why i thought it was ok to do it and if i now knew that it's wrong. i find that with all the human rights talk that's surfacing now, the kids are usually given too much power and the adults are left with too little in order to enforce discipline in a willful child. i understand that it's meant to protect children from abusive parents, but it's unfair to illegalize spanking for parents that really intend to use it just as a disciplinary tool.

sillyrabbit

the problem lies in the line that cannot be drawn.....if everyone used that form of punishment correctly, then it would be fine....but each person has their own view on whats right and wrong. there are ways to discipline a child that dont involve striking a child in any way...

until everyone knows where to draw the line between discipline and excessive abuse.....i agree with the laws set in place 100%

michaeljohn

This was one of the early threads in this forum. Let me tell you, I horsed around in the 7th grade and got a swat and kept clean after that. Working in schools the amount of disrespect I see shown to elders is absolutely overwhelming. In the old days, if you goofed off, your classmates got on your case and helped back the teachers up. Now if you act up, they join you! Swat the brats, unless the parents say no. If they say no, require community service in its stead, something to keep the clowns from misbehaving. Damn problem is the schools are so afraid of a lawsuit they let the kids get the better of them in many ways.

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koЯnut

When I was a young lad and did something I knew was wrong I got spanked. I hated it, but it worked. My wife and I go back and forth about how we are going to punish our children when we have them. I say spanking is fine. She doesn't. Thats going to be interesting later. Crazy thing is...when I was a kid i'd rather get spanked than getting grounded. I hated being grounded!

kulotsalot

adults should show that they're the boss and actually carry out their threats. (no computer use for a week!) the punishment should have enough of an impact for the child to remember if you hit them where it hurts! take away privileges that they value.

=======================

i have a cousin who can be a real pain in the arse when he's in one of his "moods." each one of my cousins is allowed an hour on the computer... now this bratty one would always want to extend his computer use, and of course the others would say that's unfair. but he wouldn't let go of the mouse, he wouldn't let go of the chair and if anybody tried to get him to move away from the computer (even his parents) he would throw nasty temper tantrums and start kicking and biting anyone who came close (again, his parents are not exempt from this behavior) he would throw stuff around, punch doors and smash stuff... very destructive! he started this behavior when he was a kid and i guess his parents felt that they couldn't control him (they would just hide in their bedroom whenever he did that) so they just tried talking to him which didn't really work. now he's 12 yrs old and very hard to control when he's mad. he is confident that he can get away with anything if he just threw enough stuff around. my parents and i think that my cousin should be given a GOOD SPANKING... how would you guys discipline this child? do you think it's possible to use non-physical disciplinary measures to keep this kid in line?

Justin

I have a family friend who is a school teacher. He says stopping the practice of corpral punishment was THE WRONG WAY TO GO.

The kids he teaches are the worst, he said since the hippie libs said "We cant have special ed, it makes the special ed kids feel bad, and they dont get the attention they deserve" Well fact is these kids need special education. But the hippies are scared of hurting these punks feelings.


WTF is a paddling? I went through dozens of them when I was in elementary school.

The worst was when my mom said "Wait till I tell your dad when he gets home!"

I was never scared of him hitting/spanking me. I was terrified he would show his dissapointment in me. That was the worst.

Indigenous

I had a lot to say about this, but then I realised I had corporal and capital punishment mixed up.

davemo2us

Ask your self this. Has is gotten better in schools or worse with these new "PC" movements, all kids pass the classes no matter what and no corporal punishment. I would have to say no way in hell and they need to forget that BS and when the kids acts up you have to do something.

VIVIX

Spank 'em, don't beat 'em. Of course with all the "Report them if they hit you" teachers. Kids feel that if they are spanked, it's wrong and should report their parents to social services. The main reason parents don't spank their children anymore is because most of the time the kid throws temper tantrums, it's in public and the parents are afraid of being reported by other parents that don't agree with physical punishment. I propose a new law...if you make the child bleed, that's wrong and you can be reported. If you tan their ass until they are bright red and probably crying, that's alright.

The ideas and views expressed by VIVIX are in no way, shape or form, related to the ideas and views of CBS.

LS1-S10

This is a subject im really big on. I think corporal punishment is deffinitely right, and is usually the only thing you can resort to. I deffinitely agree on how kids are in school today, they have no fear of there actions because all they get is a slap on the wrist. Most parents today are scared to whip there kids because of all the teachers that pound it in there kids heads that if there parents touch them, its abuse. So basically the school doesn't punish them except for a slap on the wrist....and the most they get at home is getting grounded.

Just as an example, the "PC" people against corporal punishment say that you shouldn't whip your kids but yet ask them to please stop and tell them that what there doing is wrong. Obviously none of these people have ever dealt with real children, go up to a 4 year old and tell them to please stop jumping on the bed without ever have given them a spanking. They'll pretty much laugh in your face while continuing to jump, because there is no consequence. And the funniest thing i think of all is if you go to a parenting class, they teach you to not use the word "no", but to say other things that might interest the child in another activity. Thats about the biggest buncha crap ive ever heard of, if my father had never told me no...i would have probably dropped out of school, never went to college, and MAYBE be able to land a job at a fast food resturaunt working for minimum wage.

My soon to be wife is 7 1/2 months pregnant, and you can bet your ass that both of us believe in whipping children when it's necessary. Thats how we were raised and thats how our children will be raised, regardless of what the dumbass's that make these laws think. If they want to raise there kids up to be a bunch of disrespectful hulligans, then thats fine by me...but this crap about telling other people how they can punish there children is just rediculous. All i can say is if one day my son reports me to social services for whipping him, he better hope that social worker stays around him 24/7.

meantrike17

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In my experience I would say that there is nothing inherently wrong with corporal punishment, but it does take discretion to determine when to use it. For example, its always seemed a little strange to me when I see parents spanking their children for hitting another child.

BackdoorJesus

Our kids don't require spanking often - only when they do something that hurts or disrespects others, or when they do something that could hurt themselves.

Like I said, it doesn't happen often, but when the line is crossed, the beatings commence.

Funny how nearly all of our touchy-feely parenting friends all seem to think our kids are so much more respectful & well behaved than their own are...

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Jimi

Beat them to a bloody pulp. Take them out back in the schoolyard, call out the other kids, and have a public battering! Oh yeah!