davemo2us

Well it is a thread so start at the begining. In the waiting untill you get married scam. Now don't get me wrong. There is nothing wrong with not sleeping with them on the first date (also nothing wrong with) but come on waiting for god knows how long. Probably more a ploy to get you to marry them faster.

sonrisa10201

i didnt get it either?

OrdinaryGirl

Sounds like someone is disillusioned after waiting a long time for sex and then not getting much after marriage and ending up getting divorced.

I guess the thing is....any relationship you go into for the long haul is a gamble. And if you really think that this person is "the one", then the chances of it working out are just as good, if not better, especially if you respect their boundaries. Nothing is guaranteed. But if you want to try to make a go of it, you have to take your chances and give it your best shot.

davemo2us

That is certainly true. Thruthfully everyone will know if it is the right thing to do for them to do or not and that my friends they would have to figure out for themselves.

AmorMiHombre

Hmmm, Mystic, six years and no sex?!?!? I'm guessing you are a virgin yourself?

I guess it would be sweet but 6 friggin years with NO Sex?!?! Hmmm, does that mean no oral as well? It depends on what the limits were but after a while it's kinda like...ummm.

mystichaze

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Yes, I'm a virgin. And, yes, 6 years is a long time, but we are pretty young yet. We started "dating" in Jr. High (if you could call it that then). So, for the first few years, it wasn't really much of a sexual thing, it never really came up. (That's probly different for most of you, but in small-town Nebraska, sex isn't really an issue yet at that age.) So, as for the actual length of time that sex was something we actually thought about and considered, it hasn't been six years. Sorry if that's confusing, I hope you get what I'm saying. And no, it doesn't mean no oral. That would REALLY suck.

IrishSmiles

ummm.... yes it really would suck if there really was no oral!!!

*sigh of relief* seeing as oral is allowed, then i dont mind waiting - just not toooo long though

AmorMiHombre

It's kinda like those chicks who only take it up da butt so they can be "virgins" for their wedding day.....

But to each his/her own. If what you have works for you (i'm saying this in general) than more power to ya.

billpl

"Holding out" is not a virtue. Religion is a poor excuse. Sex doesn't make you dirty. Just use caution, respect yourself and your partners and go out and enjoy yourself. It's no big deal.

Oh and one big downer for "holding out". There's a lot more to marriage than just hanging out. There's finances, mortgages, living together, jobs, housework, conflicts and soon after those little people start showing up. All take away from your sex life like it or not and regardless of how well you get along. Thinking back, I would never give up any of the premarital sexual times I had with my wife. You might consider getting as much sex as you can before climbing up on the alter.

Insaniteus

It's not about dirtiness or anything like that for me, I just want my first time to be something absolutely magical, and I want the girl to be someone I love with all of my heart.

-Insaniteus-

mystichaze

I don't know if your post was directed at me, or not, but this comment kinda pissed me off.



Why is it a poor excuse? Maybe you don't think religion is a good reason, but that doesn't mean you have to insult somebody who does. What if I told you that everything you believed in was stupid? I don't think you'd like it very much. I'm sorry if it offends you, but my religion is important to me. Religion is not the only reason we have chosen to wait. As you said yourself, respect your partner. My partner wishes to wait. I respect that. And I never said sex makes you dirty. Sex is a wonderful thing, and anybody who chooses to have sex, that's great. I have no problem with that. I don't think it's "dirty." However, as Insaniteus said, I want my first time to be magical. So, I'm going to wait until I get married to the girl of my dreams.

Nothing else you said bothered me. I respect your view just as I expect others to respect mine. However, if somebody chooses to follow their religion, don't tell them that it's a "poor" choice.

billpl

If I were directing it toward you I would have quoted you and I would have been more detailed. Not that I'm not inclined to take a pot shot or two from time to time. While I can dish it out, I can take it too...you can't offend me.

Religion does have some serious credibility issues, but I'm going to try not to start up a religious debate here. They're 1000's of religious threads and flamers on the Net, we really don't need another.

But I will say that I think God's more concerned with how you handle your relationships rather than whether or not you choose to include your penis.
Just my opinion.... and I do respect yours.

I have more to say on a reply I wrote for Insaniteus, but I am going to have to read it over so he doesn't think I'm picking on him either....

BackdoorJesus

The phrase "try before you buy" comes to mind.

I'm a little too long in the tooth to put up with the "let's wait" game for very long, and I also believe that a couple should determine that they are physically and emotionally compatible before taking the huge life steps of entering into a marriage & raising a family.

___________________________________________

mystichaze

fair enough


true, and thanks for not starting another


I also respect yours


I didn't think you were picking on me. I was pretty sure that your comment was directed at religion in general, and not at me personally, but it just struck me wrong.

Like I said, I respect your view, and have no hard feelings.