xevious

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I've gotten about 10 phone calls today from the same bill collection agency. I've told them all 10 times that this isn't his phone number. 6 times yesterday, about 7 the day before. I need some creative ideas on ways to fuck with them when they call me.

joerockhead

Oh man!!! You can have so much fun


First, do the thing where the dude acts like he is a Detective at a Crime Scene, MURDER!!!

That the guy killed himself after all the calls, and that they want the Callers Name, Company, Bosses name, Etc Etc Etc.

If you have Caller ID - When they call, answer as a Morgue

Answer in an Indian Accent as a Computer geek that cannot understand anything!

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Visit the worlds best website -
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joerockhead

"Hello, This is Wendy's Massage, we serve to please. How may we stroke, err I mean help you?"

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Visit the worlds best website -
www.badass67.com - Black Sunshine

fmb

Let the next dummy know you've told other reps this individual doesn't have the number you possess. If this doesn't work, remind the representative know you will contact your states' attorney general about this issue. Have the attorney general contact info handy; the info is readily available on the world web!

If this company doesn't get the message, call your states attorney general! This state office will fix the situation for you; in the process, your state will share with other states the "dumbass" situation other offices will be looking for similar situation shared by their citizens.

You've done your part; now let the system work.

CWB

many years back i rented an apartment . i went to the telco and did my thing . the phone was good to go in three hours .
about two weeks later the calls started (four of them) ... some collection agency looking for the previous tenant ?! turns out the telco had not changed the number !
i told the collection agency that if they didn't believe that the nimrod was no longer at this number or residence that a letter from my lawyer might prove to be more convincing .

as far as it goes though , legally , you are not bound to tell them anything that does directly pertain to you . you are not bound to tell them the whereabouts of anyone ... one reason being ; are they who they really say they are ? you are not bound to identify yourself .
after a "reasonable" amount of effort in trying to convey nicely that so-and-so aint there it becomes harassment and invasion .
sending them on a wild goose chase or giving them wrong information is not an answer to this problem .
ask them if they know the meaning of "cease and desist" ... if that doesn't work , see your lawyer .

fmb has a good point too ... there is probably a 1-800 number for just such a department .
where are our resident legal beagles ?

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xevious

oh I don't care about the calls, I could just ignore them. I just want to have a bit of fun with them now.

Juan.©amaney

Bet you can't say meow 5 times.

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zpr

Tell them they have the wrong number, then start a random conversation. Maybe try to convince them to go on a date with you.

Ryan

say meow? MEOW??

Hell.. for $20 bucks I'll call him a chickenfucker.

License and registration, CHICKENFUCKER!

bah-caaaaaaaaaaawk!

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Oh my god, I have a blog

licupssy

As everyone said the best way to get them to leave you alone is to refer them to your lawyer. I believe you mention someone in a past thread that was a friend of the family.

If the person gave your number as a home phone number they're unlikely to stop since they figure you're answering so he can ignore them.

But since it's harassment to call you let the games begin.

You'll never get any real info since they use false names to begin with but you can badger them for it and they'll most likely hang up.

You can curse them out until they put you on hold.

You could always put them on hold then turn on some music release the hold and play the music into the phone. You can switch back and forth between telling them to please hold and playing the music.

If you have caller ID you can set up call forwarding just don't answer when they call. Have it transfer to:

• to the local number of the rejection hot line
• to a Friend who can give them a hard time.
• to their toll free number
• but don't forward it to the police or someone that don't like you or you may get in trouble if your number comes up on caller ID. You have to test it with a friend to see what number comes up but the transfer would come up if a trace was made of the calls.
• note you pay for the call to the forwarding number so make sure it's in your unlimited service area.

If you have one of the old answering machines that uses taped messages, you could turn it on when they call. Set up a half a dozen or more tapes with various mp3 or other audio files on them. Maybe Juan and Kulots and others could make an mp3 for you in their native languages.

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I solemnly swear that I am up to no good! ~~~SWTWC

maggiesdragons

start watching porn when you are on the phone with them... got a vibrator? turn it on... see what happens

facepeeler

I had that happen to me last year, there was a guy that had the same phone number as me, just a different area code. This lady would call and call asking for this dude, I kept telling her she had the wrong number.

Finally I told her that if she called one more time, I was going to file harassment charges, because I've told her time and again that she had the wrong number. That got the message across.

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Cyanide & Happiness @ Explosm.net

elfoozo

I've found it works best to generally waste their time and piss them off. There's no real set act you can do that works best because of the dynamic nature of collectors.

When they call, act overly excited/couldn't wait to hear from them. This usually takes them by surprise. Gush on about how you've missed them terribly. It can be even more fun that he's male and you're female because when they're asking for John you're respond with How can I help you.

Don't blatantly admit to being who they're looking for but answer their questions from a stance that you might be that person. The longer you can drag out who they're looking for the better.

Never say you're going to pay but never deny you're never going to pay. Do things like ask for a higher line of credit so you can get more stuff... or use that money to pay their monthly fee. Tell them about things you've been wanting to buy but can't because they locked the account, etc. Tell them you're good for the economy, we're almost in a recession, etc.

When they're telling dollar amounts, act exceedingly surprised that all the other charges aren't showing up on there because you _know_ it should be a lot higher, you're wearing some of the items you picked up that day! Maybe there's something wrong with their system?

Change subjects frequently. Jump back to things discussed at the beginning of the conversation like you haven't covered them before. Act surprised all over again as they tell you things.

Best thing is to be as creative and as outlandish as you can. The quicker your wit, the more fun you'll have, the more pissed off they'll get. And knowing some of your newb bashing creativity, god help that collector when they call.