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Post em if you got em......

It's fun to cook for Tom. Today I made angel food cake. The recipe said beat 12 eggs separately. The neighbors were nice enough to loan me some extra
bowls.

Tom wanted fruit salad for supper. The recipe said serve without dressing. So I didn't dress. What a surprise when Tom brought a friend home for supper

A good day for rice. The recipe said wash thoroughly before steaming the rice. It seemed kind of silly but I took a bath anyway. I can't say it improved the rice any.

Today Tom asked for salad again so I tried a new recipe. It said prepare ingredients; lay on a bed of lettuce one hour before serving. Tom asked me why I was rolling around in the garden..

I found an easy recipe for cookies. It said put the ingredients in a bowl and beat it. There must have been something wrong with this recipe. When I got back, everything was the same as when I left.

Tom did the shopping today and brought home a chicken. He asked me to dress it for Sunday. I don't have any clothes that fit it, and for some reason Tom keeps counting to ten.

Tom's folks came to dinner. I wanted to serve roast but all I had was hamburger.
Suddenly I had a flash of genius.. I put the hamburger in the oven and set the controls for roast. It still came out hamburger, much to my disappointment.

GOOD NIGHT DEAR DIARY. This has been a very exciting week! I am eager for tomorrow to come so I can try out a new recipe on Tom. If I can talk Tom into buying a bigger oven, I would like to surprise him with a chocolate moose.

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A blonde goes into a coffee shop and notices there's A 'peel and win' sticker on her coffee cup.
So she peels it off and starts screaming, 'I've won a motor home !

I've won a motor home !'
The waitress says, 'That's impossible. The biggest prize is a free Lunch.?'
But the blonde keeps on screaming, 'I've won a motor home !
I've won a motor home !'
Finally, the manager comes over and says, 'Ma'am, I'm sorry, but you're mistaken. You couldn't have possibly won a motor home Because we didn't have that as a prize.

The blonde says, 'No, it's not a mistake. I've won a motor home !'

And she hands the ticket to the Manager and HE reads...




'W I N A B A G E L'

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Visit the worlds best website -
www.badass67.com - Black Sunshine

kulotsalot

oh weird when i first loaded up the page, all i could see was ".."

124432456

How do you know a blonde has had a bad day? Her tampon is behind her ear and she can't find her pencil!

licupssy

I was at the club the other day playing pool and went to the bar for a drink. It was a bit crowded so I'm standing there waiting for the bartender when a woman a couple seats over says to me "You have very nice eyebrows". Now, I have those thick course bushy eyebrows that grow as fast a jungle and stick out in every direction. Not wanting to make a fool of myself, I just gave her a slight smile and kept my mouth shut. It wouldn't have been so bad if it was a blonde. But as is, I wasn't sure if it was a pickup line or a joking insult.

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I solemnly swear that I am up to no good! ~~~SWTWC

facepeeler

two blondes walk into a bar.....the third one ducks.....



























*rimshot*

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Cyanide & Happiness @ Explosm.net

BradleyNIN

A blind man seats himself at a bar and asks for a drink. He then asks the 6'2, 230lb, blonde bartender if she'd like to hear a blonde joke.

"Well sir", she replies. I am a blonde professional body builder. The two girls seated at the table behind you are my blonde professional wrestler friends. The lady by the juke box is my blonde 4th degree black belt karate instructor and the blonde girl working the door just got out of prison."

"Are you sure you want to tell your joke?"

"No", he replied. "I dont feel like explaining it five times".

CWB

why do blondes like tilt steering wheels ?
more head room .

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