yeahbabyyeah

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Hello !

THis is both my first message on this forum and my most personal thread on any forum i've ever participated ... Anyway ... Here it goes:

I've been with the same women for a little less than 5 years and we now live together. My problem is the following: I don't think I'm attracted to her anymore. You see, I try to stay in shape, I go to the gym everyday, I eat well but my girlfriend doesn't really take care of her body that much and now, i'm screwed 'cause I still love her but I really wish she would loose a little weight ... PLUS, the fact that I go to the gym makes me see other women (P.S. there are some good lookin' ladies there !! ) so I end up comparing my girlfriend with them which most of them are pretty hot ...

What the heck should I do ? I still love her, I don't find her very attractive anymore, we have been living together for almost a year. Am I going to destroy that relationship for something THAT shallow ? Am I normal to find other women attractive and not my girlfriend (probably not) ?

I almost forgot to mention: her personality COULDN'T possibly be more perfect which makes it even harder to break up... She always listens to me when I'm down, she cooks like a goddess, she pays attention to every single details, she's fun, honest, brilliant, etc. etc. (X1000)

Reply if you have any suggestions, comments, if it has happened to you before.

I have a weird feeling that I'm gonna go straight to hell for this ... No detour to heaven, just straight down to hell ...

clamsrus

If you don't find other women attractive THEN there would be something wrong with you!!

and yes you probably will destroy your relationship over it unless you get your head around it and focus on the person and not the physical appearance.

As to finding her physically attractive.....I guess she could work her buns off to try to be what you want...but why bother if that's where you are coming from.

Check out the geriatic couples in the retirement homes....all those folks started out probably attracted to each other for a whole range of reasons.....and ended staying with the same person for a whole range of different reasons...the best one being an old fashioned ingredient called love, which often got deeper along with the wrinkles

Hell.....hey that's where all the hot chicks go....LOL

theworldismytoy

Clamsrus is right...in the end you have a decision to make about what's more important to you, the relationship or her looks. You say that you love her but have you taken the time lately to figure out if you are in love with her? For that matter, have you defined what the word love means to you? If you take a hard look you my love her, and what she does for you, but you just aren't in love with her. In my experience when you are in love with someone there's a deeper level of attraction that goes beyond the physical, in that way that you could be blind and still want to jump the person when you are near them, you aren't so much attracted to what they look like and more to the person that they are. That being said, if you have had such a strong relationship to this point, why can't you talk to her about your feelings and get some of her feed back, after all if it's a problem for you in terms of the relationship then it's a problem for her(being a part of that relationship) as well. This is really between you and her, and yet you seem to be making it out to be just your problem. If you are afraid to talk to her, that right there might just tell you something about the relationship.

mushroomvr6

why dont u pay 4 a membership 2 ur gym 4 her and say that u thought it could b something u could do together.that way u could b spendin time together and she could b looking after her "health" (looks).