breskin2

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I have just graduated from high school and it’s the summer before I go to college and I have been a friend with this girl for two years. The first year she liked me a lot almost to the obsessed point but I had no desire at all for a girlfriend and I told her this and she settled for just being my friend. Since then she has become one of my best friends.

Her boyfriend of something like 7 months and the one that took her virginity had dumped her a month ago because his mom told him too, which is bullshit in the first place, he is still in the picture with her though and she still loves him.

Well last night was the last night that I would see her before she left for a month and we were waiting in a dark park for my other friend to call us to go pick her up. One thing lead to another and we started having sex and in the middle of it she says "I can't do this I am thinking about (ex's name) to much" so I got off her and we got dressed, luckily my friend called soon but it was late so we just ended up saying good bye. Now I won’t see her for a month and I am afraid that things are going to be weird now.

What should I do?

sorry about the long explanation.

Jabooty_3

That other guy broke up for a stupid reason, but he is still gone. I'd say go for it, she likes you.

iwantenzo

i think you should go for it. you two will just have to talk about it and not ignore it ..

ikky68

you should talk to her before hand.

if she gets to thinking that you took advantage of her in a time of weakness, you'll lose that friend.

BackdoorJesus

If you want to stay 'just friends' & don't want 'weirdness' to seep in from this one encounter, I say never mention it again; it didn't happen.

If (and only if) she becomes emotionally available to you at a later time, however, and you both (by your perception or by what she says) want to try taking it to the next level, THEN maybe bring it up.

But don't take it to the next level if you have much more than an inkling in the back of your mind that it isn't the right thing & has potential. If you do go there & it doesn't work out, I assure you that it will be a long time, if ever, that you will be friends again.

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breskin2

hey thanks for the replies. it turned out to be a week and not a month that she was gone. we started hanging out again and everything was cool then we had sex again last night and this time instead of bailing out at 5 minutes she did it at 30 for the same reason as last time. I am ok with this because i can understand what she is feeling a little bit. One thing is that i do not want a girlfriend out of this girl.

dan1225

if you dont want a girlfriend out of her then i dont think you should be anything more than friends with her.. but since you've already had sex i think its a little past that point. I think if both of you can put that behind then you guys are very strong mentally. 7 months is pretty long for a highschool relationship and of course she is going to have her head on her ex, its only a matter of time that the highschool effect kicks in and she'll be over him, just think out real clearly what you want from her in all types of situations and try to go from there

popopopo

You're dealing with two totally separate problems here.

First, she needs to work out her feelings for this guy she was once with. Only then, can you consider a relationship with her. It will probably be akward with her the next time you guys are together but who knows. Best of luck!