Agitator7834

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i am 18 years old and going into my first year of college in August. One of my good friends, who happens to be a girl, is also attending the same school as me. I have known her since the elementary years and i have always had a thing for her. She claims she had a crush on me throughout early high school, but i kept denying her because at the time i didn't think i needed a girlfriend. She now has had a boyfriend of 2 years and he seems like a real douche. He's big into drugs and treats her like garbage and i hate to see her getting treated like that. She also claims she loves him...Is she completely done with me? I feel im ready to have a relationship with her but im not sure how to approach her.

I know i'm young and kind of clueless about relationships but I feel that this girl is the one for me, I see myself spending the rest of my life with her. I just need advice on what to do and how to do it. Im really confused guys and i need guidance for what to do.

-The Agitator

Lucky13

Als I can say is don't ever go into a relationship planning to spend the rest of your life with someone before you even get on the first date. You'll move too fast and things will get weird. You might scare her off, or you set up unrealistic expectations that will only lead to trouble down the road. Don't try to start a relationship with her right now because you want her to raise your kids in a decade, just pursue it if you think you two can have fun now.

zeppy

Quoted for truth.


Plus, if you and her are at the point where she tells you about her relationship with her boyfriend and that she loves him, you are in the friend zone. No chance of relationships once in the friend zone.

But, on the plus side, you are entering the wonderful world of college, where there are oceans of horny young freshman girls yours for the taking! Goodluck!

Agitator7834

ha ha thanks zeppy, and you too Lucky, but is there anyway i can escape that friend zone, i mean, she had feelings for me, is there any way to ask her is she still does?

zeppy

My guess would be no. The friend zone seems to be pretty much inexcapable.


However, you could just talk to her about how you feel and ask her how she feels... maybe this will reveal something. The downside is that if she doesn't still have feelings (which I would assume she doesn't) it might make things ackward, so you will have to weight the pros and cons before you make the decision to have the talk.

For the record though, freshman year is far more fun without a girlfriend. :happycow:

skept

This is what I think mate... and this is speaking from personal experience....

Tell her how you feel and say you want to go out with her. You have to do this to bring closure otherwise you will forever be asking yourself 'what if?!'. If she says no then leave don't think about it again - enjoy your freshman years as a bachelor.

If she says yes - make sure its a definate - like she'll break up and go with you. If she says 'yes but when this current relationship ends' or 'I would in the future' blow her off and leave. Don't waste your time - every moment you spend lamenting over her is another moment that the love of your life could have just walked past in your life.

Agitator7834

alright, thanks guys, i got a pretty good understanding of what i should do. I'll try and keep you updated. I appreciate the advice you guys, youve been a big help.

Agitator7834

damn, when i hung out with her today, for some reason i didnt have the balls to tell her how i felt...damn this is frustrating. How the hell do I approach this?

skept

There are 3 levels of well personal you can goto.

The best is face to face - you get her reaction straight away and you'll know exactly where you will stand. The level down is over the phone - a lil less personal then face to face but sitll effective none the less. If you can't work up the courage to phone/see her and tell her face to face send her a sms.

tsmo

you could always go do something with her. and see how she reacts.

Thats got to be the simplest thing. your both friends right? so to go grab a bite to eat somewhere isnt unexpected. right? just do that. tell her you want to hang out and grab a bite to eat. once your sitting together, across from each other. the converstation will flow. from there youll have a bazillionity chances to figure out what shes thinking. how she feels. how you feel, and if you should say something.. etc etc..

Good luck.

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I'm a terminal non-achiever